2023 Wrapped

Dearest gentle reader, did you miss me ?

Just as the name suggests I'm going to take you through all that went through in 2023, lessgoooo. 

The first 3 months were basically the 2nd half of my internship. My year started with a visit to Tanjung Malim and of course it’s always great to be back home, it feels like going back after a semester break. I was just making full use of my wfh schedule.

Went to Harris concert with my girl pals in february and all i want to say is concerts should be regarded as therapy cause oh gosh i had a blast. It was my first non-sid sriram concert so i didn't know what to expect but Harris exceeded my expectations. Something about screaming your lungs out.

we met shyam y'all 😭

I got done with my internship at the end of March with some great memories. I'd always be thankful for all the lessons learned and right after i was already on a quest to secure a job. Though I already had a lineup of things and tasks that I wanted to do, I intend to take it slow and not allow things to get on me (who was i kidding). I really invested time on the things that i was missing out at that moment, catching up with friends and doing things that i wasnt't able to do before due to work responsibilities.

Went on my first ever solo trip to Kelantan on May ! I still squeal when I talk about it to anyone else cause I managed to execute it after meticulous planning. Just so grateful to god that I am capable of bringing myself all alone to a place I've never been before and know nothing about. I’ve written a separate blog on it that you may check out ; link to the blog

It was this moment when reality hit me hard, the job hunt process started and it never ended. Ricebowl, indeed, linkedin, jobstreet, you name it i have tried posting applications to all of it. Every morning I would wake up and spend hours, seated in front of my laptop, filling up particulars for jobs. These went on for months. I know and I have heard a lot on how fresh grads find it extremely hard to get a job but that ‘vellai illai pattathari’ phase was an ache, an ache that you can't find the right adjectives to describe. It’s when you will have unsolicited advice from all four corners trying to confuse you than you already are. I think above all it’s the inferior that you have to fight with when all your friends whom you've started with on the same page have already things going on in their career line. 

Since i had lots of time in my hand, i started watching lots and lots of movies and series, I also started to read more books. I got so obsessed with ponniyan selvan that i bought the books so that i could read it for myself and fact check on the details as shown in the movie

This was also the time where I had the opportunity to work as a temporary teacher and the best part of all was that it was the same school that my mum works at. I just wanted to give it a shot at least for the sake of keeping myself occupied. Coming from a non-teaching academic background, there were parts that appeared unclear to me and I learnt so many things during my span there. I never once thought that I could teach students and that I will have the patience to handle them but life just surprises you in ways you could never imagine. It’s the job that I never knew I needed to do in order to fully understand where life has brought me today. After the two months, i started including and considering teaching jobs in the process of job application 

my beloved 2A pupils 

matchy matchy with my mum 

At the end of August my family and I took a short trip to Cameron’s. As much as i was looking forward to the trip, my mum wanted to make this trip happen. It was at Cameron’s that she got her first teaching posting after completing her studies so i know how special this trip was to her. Of fresh strawberries, piping hot tea and beautiful views, the whole holiday was chef’s kiss. 

September happens to be the month of job hunting, day and night and lazing off the whole month. I had the chance to work as a temporary teacher in a different school early october but it didn’t last long as i was offered a job elsewhere, which i thought was going to be my first full time job. Upon entering the work, i knew for sure that it wouldn't work for me and that my mental health would thank me if I left the work right away. If there’s one thing this year that I didn't wish for, it would be this work experience. Mid october, i joined another workplace and alhamdulillah things have been good since then. I still am processing the fact that I am a teacher now, perhaps all the rejected offers were meant to bring me where I am today. It certainly is a challenging career, there are days i feel super worn out and overstimulated by the end of the day but i believe that god has placed me with these kids for a reason and that I will be given the strength to persevere through it

I have also started something new that is tiring enough to make me sleep almost anywhere and anytime. Strangely life gets harder when all you want to do is make it easy. I’ve taken a huge leap of faith on this in hopes that it will all be worth it someday. Guess it comes with a cost that you've gotta bare with.

November was a crazy hectic month of back to back travelling. Went johor after a year of my grandfather’s passing and realised that grief comes back, without any prior notice. Drags you into this weird state of melancholy that just stays for a moment till it dissapears, makes a re-entry when you are least expecting it. I am still learning to live with it. We also took a trip to Penang to attend my sister’s convocation. Had my graduation 4 days after that. I guess we were all too tired from back to back travelling that we hadn't had the time to take it all in, take in all the happy moments that should be celebrated. I’m so blessed to be able to graduate at the same time as my sister or else this picture wouldn't have been possible ;

I’ve always been proud seeing the heights she’s been reaching. To have graduated is my icing of the cake for the year 2023. Tanjung malim has been and will always be my favourite place. It's a comfort that I have never gotten elsewhere. I consider myself lucky to have been given the chance to graduate in the same place twice. Thank you for making my life happy in so many ways, grateful for the experience. 

 

              

And to wrap it all up, prasannaa and I went on our very long overdue genting trip at the end of the year. I think 18 years old nalinie would not have believed that a friendship which started off with a safety pin, would be the one that stays with, through it all. We have shared many great moments but this genting trip was the best one of all. For someone who has a major fear of height, going on theme park rides was a no-go. I guess the ‘just follow along, you can one’ 67 times really helped it but in all honesty it was a wholesome one. 10/10 would do it again.

I would view 2023 as a year of trials and tribulations as I struggled so hard to find my ground. I kinda met the strongest version of myself this year. From doing all the things I have never done before to making big girl decisions. Through it all, it has also been a year of pinch me moments with all the great things that have happened, wedding preps, graduation, road trips and celebrations. I've had an equal portion of keeping my social life going and spending lots and lots of time alone. It has also been an abundance of year when it comes to travelling , i was able to cover kelantan, cameron, johor, penang and twice to genting. I have reached a point in my life where I feel like I don't need anyone and that I am better off alone. Setting boundaries with people and things kinda helps with so many things like it doesn’t have to make sense to anyone if it makes you happy. Learning how to be happy alone kinda sort out life itself doesn’t it ?